I have attached the instructions and the previously completed essay. This should be a revised version taking the feedback provided in the graded version into account.
Here are the overall notes: Thank you for submitting your persuasive RD. This draft does a very effective job of integrating research throughout to support your claims. The biggest piece of feedback that will strengthen this for the revision assignment is to focus more on being persuasive rather than informative. The persuasive nature of this report doesn’t happen until nearly halfway through when you start discussing the benefits of community gardens. The first half is focused on explaining the causes of food and security. While that is a relevant piece of information to your argument, that information could be condensed into just a few paragraphs rather than the several pages that is spent on it. By focusing more on why your community should implement a community garden, you will better align to the persuasive task. I have left detailed feedback on the file notes so please review those thoroughly. Good luck upon your final assignment!! – Hannah
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