I will send the essay to be fixed by incorporating one of the following 2 thesi

I will send the essay to be fixed by incorporating one of the following 2 thesis statement
Thesis
1. Cubism expresses a modern experience of acknowledging different points of view through the representation of a subject through multiple perspectives. The most important aspect is not that things are just shown from different angles or that space is altered, but that it represents a new way of seeing that is modern. Picasso uses form and Matisse uses color to achieve their cubist goals.
2. While Picasso shows cubism by breaking with linear perspective through the manipulation of form or structure to show multiple views of space, Matisse uses color to transform space and challenge linear perspective
Also, please can the writer tad more analysis in the Picasso painting.
I like the way you begin the Picasso section talking about what it was in an earlier form and then discuss how it is now. but can its possible to point out a few more details in cubism
thanks