Hi Y’all: Please see 2 attachments. :1 is a draft essay. 2> is rules. I want be

Hi Y’all:
Please see 2 attachments. :1 is a draft essay. 2> is rules.
I want be in computer science. I love the numbers. With the numbers I can flow like a water in the numbers. Love keep pressing forward and solve math problems and challenging the problems with the numbers. As we know to do writing and reading with confidence we have to learn alphabet and learn to pronunciation, vocab and grammar correctly of each word. Same thing with math. We will learn and understand the numbers from 0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9. In the beginning our introduction with math as children if we will build solid bridge of the knowledge of the math. It will be easy to play with the numbers and follow up the rules to solve the complex math problems. Each numbers has a huge power to effect our Nature and Human life. I think the Computer Science is a great field for intellectually challenging best human mind in the human life.
Important Notes:
This essay must follow the essay outline introduced in the “How to Outline a Five-Paragraph Essay” handout (i.e., it must contain a thesis statement per the guidelines described in the “Thesis – Statement” handout, which is located under this week’s Study materials).
You are not required to use external sources for this exercise; however, if you do use external sources or the Bible you must cite the source accordingly. As this is a narrative essay, you will back up your topic sentences with narrative or experiential evidence instead of research.
Your thesis statement will answer both of these questions in one sentence.
Your brief essay must contain between 400-600 words.